March 30, 2020, was the first day working at this clinic; it was the same day I was supposed to be returning from my honeymoon in Panama.

That’s from our May Reflections essay, “Built for This,” which is free for the rest of May (along with the entire issue, in honor of Nurses Month). Written by Janey Kottler, a family nurse practitioner and clinical instructor, the essay is about volunteering at a clinic on Chicago’s West Side, which was hard-hit by Covid-19. There she encountered families placed under impossible pressure and risk by the need to keep their jobs during the pandemic.

I think about the single mother and her two children I treated recently. The mother is an essential worker at a grocery store and utilizes her neighbor for childcare during work hours. The family’s neighbors are elderly: the wife stays at home while her husband is an essential worker, working on a factory line. They were grateful to have an income throughout the pandemic until her husband fell ill after COVID exposure at work. He has now inadvertently exposed his wife and the children she babysits.

‘Built for this.’

She also found a profound sense of teamwork and purpose, and—despite the marks on her face from the mask she wears, her concern about infecting her new husband, and the nightmares each night about not touching her face—she discovers a sense of growing strength in her own skills and capabilities as a nurse.

I feel my purpose revitalized at this clinic. It is my nurse training that I rely on to care for my anxious and fearful patients. What is foreign territory for me is dealing with my own anxieties and fears. The nursing mentality is complicated: we typically prioritize patients, family, and friends above ourselves. These unprecedented times require being kind not only to others but also to yourself…

The essay is just one page, but written in a strong first-person voice that would be hard to summarize. Take a moment and read it here.