The Words We Use to Talk About the Act of Suicide

    marie + alistair knock/flickr creative commons

Suicide. A dear friend of mine died this way almost 40 years ago, leaving behind a beautiful six-month-old boy and a beloved and loving husband. I have never given any thought to the way we friends and family refer to her death. Then last week, I came across a 2015 blog post by the sister of a man who died in the same way.

In the post on a website that shares experiences of disability and mental illness, former hospice social worker Kyle Freeman argues that this term suggests criminality. She points to laws in the U.S. that, until a little more than 50 years ago, defined suicide as a criminal act. Kyle feels this history has perpetuated a sense of shame and embarrassment in survivors.

“…the residue of shame associated with the committal of a genuine crime remains attached to suicide. My brother did not commit a crime. He resorted to suicide, which he perceived, in his unwell mind, to be the only possible solution to his tremendous suffering.”

Kyle believes that the common use of the phrase “committed suicide” is not only inaccurate but can add to the suffering of those who have lost friends or family in this way. She prefers the term dying by suicide. […]

2017-09-15T09:29:16-04:00September 15th, 2017|family experience, patient experience|0 Comments

Please Nurse: Needing to Feel Human Again in the ICU  

Ruby Vogel circa 1970. Courtesy of Shannon Perry.

The patient perspective below was written by Ruby Vogel in 1976, shortly after she was discharged from the hospital following a cholecystectomy and colon surgery. Her daughter Shannon Perry, PhD, RN, FAAN, professor emerita at San Francisco State University, recently received the document from her sister, also a nurse and former nursing educator, to whom their mother had originally given it.

According to Perry’s sister, who found the document while cleaning out some files, Vogel had thought her daughter could use the information to help her students understand the experiences of patients in the ICU. Some things were different back then—for example, says Perry, a cholecystectomy and colon surgery were major surgeries with several days in the hospital for recovery. But some things stay the same, and this vivid account highlights how patient-centered care—a touch, a hand on the brow—can make the difference. Ruby Vogel died in 1985.

Intensive care put me in a different world—of noises, silly ideas, and feelings. I seemed apart from people. They came and went but I wasn’t people, just that big sore place. I could hear and I could see. People didn’t seem to speak to me nor stay around long enough for my eyes to focus or my lips to form words. In and out. Checking! Checking! Checking! I could see and hear. Family, nurses came in, took a look and left. I was still there.

That awful machine next […]

2017-09-11T10:45:55-04:00September 11th, 2017|patient experience, Patients|0 Comments

Nurse-Author Theresa Brown Reflects on Recent Book About Doctor-Patient Communication

Nurse and frequent contributor to the New York Times Theresa Brown writes a column for AJN called What I’m Reading, in which she reflects on a recent book about an aspect of health care. This month she examines What Patients Say, What Doctors Hear (Beacon Press, 2017), by physician Danielle Ofri.

The book is about communication with patients, about real listening and the kinds of listening that often substitute for it, sometimes to the real harm of patients. Brown also considers some differences between the ways physicans and nurses tend to talk to patients. Here’s a brief excerpt, but we recommend that you read the short article, which is currently free:

Can any of us, nurses or physicians, say that we always listen as well as we should, giving each patient’s story our full attention? Like physicians, nurses feel the unrelenting pressure of time constraints. Although I try very hard to listen well, I’m sure there are times when I fail. Ofri’s book reminds us that it is clinically important to listen to what our patients say. Ironically, such listening can save time in the long run. But the main reason for doing so is simple: in order to give patients the best care possible, we need to hear what they’re actually trying to tell us.

Brown’s column is not a book review; while she draws readers’ attention to books that are well worth reading, the column goes beyond this purpose, […]

Those Who Comfort Us

There was only a tiny drop of blood. I was worried, of course, but I went to my OB-GYN for reassurance more than anything else. Maybe she would tell me I was doing too much and needed to rest. Maybe it was just normal. But as soon as she looked at the ultrasound screen, I knew.

Usually when I went for a scan, she immediately turned the screen toward me. Until now, every scan had been great. I had just entered my second trimester. The barrage of tests given to women of “advanced maternal age” had all come back normal. The baby’s heartbeat was strong at every visit, and I was riddled with nausea, something I’d been told was a “good sign.”

This time she stared at the screen for what seemed like forever. Then, quietly, she told me that my baby of 16 weeks’ gestation no longer had a heartbeat. Moments later, the high-risk doctor came in to confirm this. I turned away as he talked to my doctor about the “degradation” he could see, suggesting the death had happened over a week before. Somehow this terrible word—and image—is what stuck with me, even weeks after the event.

Later I entered the ambulatory center where I would have […]

‘She’s Alive Because Of You’: A Nurse’s Advocacy Pays Off

Katie L. George, DNP, RN, AG-ACNP, CCRN. Photo courtesy of Katie L. George. Katie L. George, DNP, RN, AG-ACNP, CCRN

While attending this year’s American Association of Critical-Care Nurses National Teaching Institute meeting, AJN editor-in-chief Shawn Kennedy heard a story that she felt all nurses needed to hear as a reminder of the impact a nurse’s advocacy can have on a patient.

Critical care nurse Katie George, just a few years into her career when the events in the story took place, was caring for Ms. A., a young woman whose spinal cord had been nearly severed in a car accident.

Faced with a prognosis suggesting that Ms. A.’s quality of life would be poor and that she would have to remain on a ventilator, Ms. A.’s family made what they felt was the humane decision to have her removed from life support. But Ms. A.’s fiancé—and her nurse Katie George—were convinced that Ms. A., who seemed to be able to communicate by blinking in response to questions, should at least be given the chance to make the decision for herself.

Ms. A. was suffering from locked-in syndrome, a condition in which the patient is conscious and eye movement […]

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