About Hui-wen Sato, MSN, MPH, RN, CCRN

Hui-Wen (Alina) Sato, MSN, MPH, RN, CCRN, is a pediatric intensive care nurse in Southern California and blogs at http://heartofnursing.blog.

Levels of Weariness Among Nurses

I imagine that nurses throughout the world are constantly being asked “How are things at work these days?”—with the implied question being “How are you holding up with your work situation?” While my colleagues and I in our pediatric hospital have not seen an overwhelming surge of COVID+ patients come through our doors, we have certainly seen some, with an uptick in our COVID+ census as the numbers throughout the country have increased.

When I pause at this point in the conversation, the usual response I get is, “Oh, that’s so good to hear. You’re lucky.” And I agree and reflect this back to whoever I’m speaking with. My heart hurts for my fellow nurses in other parts of the nation who have been utterly overwhelmed by COVID and its cruelty. I recognize that I am indescribably lucky.

At the same time, though it’s hard to articulate why, even nurses who haven’t been hit by the surges seen in other hospitals bear layers of deep weariness by this point in the pandemic. […]

Cast Into the Shadows: COVID-19’s Power Over Non-COVID Cases

As a pediatric ICU nurse in a hospital that has not experienced an overwhelming surge of COVID-19 patients, it has taken me some time to register the ways this pandemic has affected my perspective and practice.

Non-COVID diagnoses left in the shadows.

Photo by Unjay Markiewicz/ Unsplash

I recently took care of two young patients, each with acute and unexpected conditions. One was under post-operative care after a brain tumor had been removed the day before. The other had been newly diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. What stood out to me as I interacted with their families was that these were some of the only people I would interact with in this period who did not have COVID foregrounded in their mental and emotional space. This feeling was followed by the sobering realization that this was only because they found themselves dealing with something just as insidious, if not more so.

In both cases, the families observed confusing symptoms in their children and had to wrestle with whether or not to go to the ED in the midst of a pandemic. Only when the symptoms became so severe and concerning did these families decide they could no longer avoid the ED. Now facing an inpatient hospital stay […]

Dissonance and Harmony: Balancing Nursing and Home Life During the Holidays

Between worlds.

There is nothing quite like the holiday season in a culture obsessed with happiness at all costs to make me feel the complexity of navigating back and forth between work and home life as a pediatric ICU nurse.

Home life as a mother to two young children, wife, friend, and community citizen takes on an intense pace from just before Thanksgiving through the new year. I am coordinating celebrations with family and friends, keeping tabs on the kids’ school holiday programs, addressing Christmas cards, and deftly dodging BOGO promotional emails day and night. Life feels boundless with possibilities for activity and opportunity.

I arrive at work and enter the room of my patient, whose life has been brought to a screeching halt. She lies sedated, restrained by lines and tubes, barely oriented to day versus night. If not for the holiday decorations that we put up around the unit, there may be no indication of what season it is.

What is cheerful for me to anticipate at home during the holidays may be potentially disheartening for my patients and their families to consider. I can leave the hospital at will. They cannot. I am sensitive to this fact, and my demeanor when I talk about the holidays at work becomes […]

Amidst Nursing’s Daily Challenges, a Longing for Enduring Meaning

Early ideals, current reality.

I recently co-facilitated a breakout session at a national nursing conference in which we had the participants reflect upon life experiences that sparked their initial desire to go into nursing.

Some knew from a very early age that they were drawn to providing care for others. Others, like myself, were second-career nurses who had spent time in other professions before making our way into nursing.

We spent time talking about our early idealism about the profession and the various experiences or issues that have challenged our ideals over time. I was struck by the deep and broad range of emotions in the room: pride, frustration, hope, discouragement, cynicism, and longing.

‘An almost palpable ache.’

It is the longing that stood out to me the most.

The nurses I met in that room, and nurses I meet everywhere, certainly express longing for better staffing, improved systems that facilitate smoother workflow, and a supportive work environment. But these are all longings that tie into one deeper longing, which is a longing for enduring meaning in our day-to-day work—as hard as some days may be—and a broader […]

What’s a Preceptor’s Duty When a New Nurse Doesn’t Fit the Unit?

Challenges and joys.

square peg, round hole

Precepting new graduate nurses is challenging but also exhilarating. To guide a new nurse to a point of safe, confident, independent patient care requires a different level of critical thinking and relational skills. How do I delegate tasks and responsibility to my preceptee safely? How do I teach in a way that connects well with my preceptee’s learning style? How do I reassure the patient and family that they are safe in the care of these new hands under my watch?

Despite the challenges, it is inspiring to play an integral role in someone’s growth. I experience pride and joy watching my preceptees evolve from nervous trainees to skilled and compassionate novice nurses.

While I am always seeking to build up the new graduate nurse I’m precepting, the ultimate goal is always patient safety. There are rare times when new nurses have not not found the ‘right fit’ in our unit. We are a pediatric ICU unit in a level one trauma hospital. We care for very sick patients, are very fast-paced, and rarely have lulls in our census.

When a preceptee struggles.

I recently had a preceptee who struggled with the basics in caring for even our most stable patients. […]

2019-01-09T12:17:49-05:00January 9th, 2019|Nursing|4 Comments
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