Unseen Struggles: When the Pain of Chronic Illness Meets Disbelief

A friend’s desperation.

Photo by Ben Blennerhassett on Unsplash

It was early in the morning when I received a call from my best friend, who was crying and
distraught. She frantically rattled off her symptoms: “My stomach is on fire, I can’t sleep, nothing is relieving the discomfort, and I’m in excruciating pain.” Although she’d been feeling discomfort for the previous two weeks, at first she’d thought the intensity of her current symptoms might be from food poisoning. Given her not always healthy diet, which she and I had discussed in the past, I too at first thought she might have eaten something that set the symptoms off.

“It hurts so badly I don’t think I can take it anymore,” she told me over the phone. “I can’t stop going to the bathroom.”

She said that despite the severity of her pain, her family just thought she was being dramatic. I could sense her desperation as she sobbed over the phone. Even though she did not want to seek medical attention, I begged her to go to the nearest clinic or hospital and told her I’d meet her there.

Crohn’s disease: When nurses doubt a patient’s pain.

In the emergency department (ED) where she […]

Scientist, Healer, Nurse

. . . we’d sliced his chest cavity open during our dissection, rendering his beating heart clearly visible. He was pinned to a small tray and covered with a cheesecloth. I brought him home in a shoe box on a sparsely populated school bus, and placed him carefully on the coffee table in the living room.

If the above excerpt sounds like it’s lifted from the intimate memoirs of a torturer, it’s not. It’s from the May Reflections essay, “The Soul on the Head of a Pin,” which is written by Marcy Phipps (for the nicest version, click through to the PDF once you’ve reached the article at our Website). Marcy is a nurse who uses a simple, elegantly rendered childhood story to explore the sometimes unnerving gap inside every nurse between the roles of objective scientist and compassionate healer. -JM

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